[The following are hypothetical opinions of imaginary characters, for your amusement.]
“With
all your prating about democracy, you know full well that it is a bundle of
lies. Real democracy, full democracy,
can never work,” said Fal Ban Oh, the Chinese sophomore.
“Certainly
it can work. If the people are really
empowered, they will make the right choices,” said Charles Orson, law student
from Vermont.
“Bullsh**,”
said Sal Gregory, the business student from Ohio. “’The people.’ What a crock.”
“Oh, so
you think we’d be better off if we were run by a communist politburo?”
“It’s
working well for us,” said Oh.
“You
can’t call them communists,” said Charles.
“They’re exploiting their own people, like the capitalists did here 100
years ago.”
“So
what are you then,” Sal said, jabbing an index finger towards Charles, “the true communist?”
“No,
I’m not a communist. I believe people
should be free, and if they are they will rise to their true potential.”
“Ha!”
Sal retorted. “What a bunch of la-de-da
pie in the sky.”
“Well, it’s never really been
tried.”
“What? What have we been doing here for the past 200
years?”
“You think they’ve been free? They’ve been slaves to low-paying jobs. They haven’t had health care, and the
education they get is crap.”
“Who’s this ‘they’? The people?
The masses.”
“No, not the masses. Just regular people. Like us.”
“Hey, I’m just a regular person as
much as anybody else, but I know that if I want anything decent in life, I’ll
have to work for it.”
“F*** everybody else?”
“No. They can work, too. They’re welcome to work as much as I am.”
“Flipping burgers? Picking grapes?”
“They don’t have to settle for sh** like that.”
“Oh don’t they? You think the economy is so great, they can
just put on a tie and walk into corporate headquarters and get a $100,000 a
year job?”
Sal pressed his lips together and
blew a raspberry at him.
“I mean, the point is…” Charles
paused and regrouped. “There’s millions
of unemployed people who would love to not have to settle for flipping burgers.”
“Tell ‘em to go to North Dakota.”
“Yeah, sure. Just pack up and move to some crazy boom-town
and live in a dormitory?”
“Life ain’t always easy or fun.”
“So, f*** ‘em?”
“Ahh, bullsh**. So what are we supposed to do? Just give everybody everything, then nobody
will have to work if they don’t want to?”
“They’ll work if they can get a
decent job.”
“Why should they if they have
everything given to them?”
“Well, obviously they wouldn’t get
everything. Just enough to have a
minimum standard of living.”
“Oh, sure, and how much is
that? And who’s going to pay for
it? Me, I suppose, with sky-high taxes!”
“Well, if you’re making good money,
you could afford it.”
“Oh, yeah, and I’m working and
slaving away, and half my income goes to people who are sitting on their
asses.”
“They wouldn’t just sit there if
they could get a decent job.”
“Wanna bet?”
“You have no faith in people, do
you? Ya gotta believe they would want to
do better than a minimum standard of living.”
“Lots of people would. Not everybody.”
“Most people.”
“So that leaves only a few million,
I suppose, sitting on their asses. Just
a few billion dollars drained into their fat, lazy mouths.” Charles sat back and took a few gulps of his
beer.
“You Americans are so
closed-minded” said Oh, who had been sitting back watching the two. “You can’t see past your little political
arguments. In China we are looking
towards the future of our country. We
are part of something greater than ourselves.”
“That’s nice,” said Sal.
“You should try it, you Americans.”
“We believe in America, of course,”
said Sal. “At least I do.” He smirked and raised his beer can towards
Charles, who gave him a half-hearted sneer.
“You say you believe in
America. First of all, I don’t know how
you can, except that you don’t know any better.
You were born here, you were raised here and have been fed American
myths all your lives. You don’t
appreciate the fact that from our viewpoint and that of most of the rest of the
world, you have done terrible things.”
“Oh, and I suppose Mao tse tung and
Stalin were your favorite philanthopists,” said Sal.
Oh ignored that and went on. “And you say you believe in America, but you
are all just ‘me, me, me. What can
America do for me, and why should I do anything for it?’ Both of you. You don’t know what it means to serve a
greater cause than yourselves.”
“Hmm, the greater good, and all
that,” said Sal. “Well, you know, in
America we believe that if individuals follow what’s good for them, in the end
it turns out that it benefits America as a whole. Anyway, we are all about the
individual—rights, freedoms, etc.”
“Me, me, me,” Said Oh.
“Well, you guys have been doing
much better since you started going our way a little bit. More free markets, free trade and all that.”
“Of course. But we never stopped believing in our
country. We will always believe in it
and that everything we do is for its greater glory.”
“Everything? So people who move from the country to the
cities don’t think about finding work to feed their families?”
“Listen, let me tell you something
about all that,” said Oh. He was sitting
on the edge of a plain old wooden straight-backed chair. He took a gulp of his Amstel Light. “Whatever we do, we do for China. What we were doing before was not
working. So we are doing something
different. Our leaders were smart enough
to see that some of your cut-throat ways gave you great power. We need power. We need it to defend ourselves against
you.” He poked his finger towards
Sal. “And you, too.” He poked it at Charles, who looked offended.
They all sat there a minute
considering Oh’s comment. Oh sat back in
his chair, looking a bit uncomfortable with his outburst.
“Well,” said Charles, “it’s true we
have offended you...”
“You have no idea!” said Oh.
“Wait a minute,” said Sal. “It wasn’t us. We fought the first revolution against
colonialists.”
“Then you became just like them!”
“Listen,” said Sal. “The world would be a much more f***ed-up
place without America. We’re like George
Bailey—you know, in ‘It’s a Wonderful Life?’
What would the world be like without America? The world might be shocked if they could find that out.”
“You are right about one thing: the
world is f***ed up, and as a Chinese citizen I know that China cannot continue
to be weak. It has to become strong to
keep from being a pawn in the game. It
is a great country with a great heritage, and it deserves to be great.”
“Cool, I’ll drink to that,” said
Charles.
"Here, here,” said Sal, and drained
his can.
